now with 400% more truth!
i was born in the middle of a blizzard and from there on out, the world got 4982 times more awesome (scientifically proven!!). i spent my early years living on a houseboat with a gang of feral cats and my dad (who may or may not have been feral). we traveled a lot, my favourite of which was venus in the winter. eventually, my dad had to be returned to the government because his robot batteries needed to be recharged so i went to live with wolves. during this time, i wrote 15 best sellers. eventually, i left the wolf pack to attend college and these days, i grow prize winning daffodils.
my greatest ambition is to someday evolve into a velociraptor.